Stories: Humerous Cat Adventures
Stories on the theme "Humerous Cat Stories".
Cats do some amusing things.
Authors retain copyright to their work, but have given permission for their work to be published on W. V. Cats.
My Big Day Outside
A recounting of a true event, told from the imagined view of the cat.
My Big Day Outside
By Ranger, typed by Mark Webster, the human
Dear Aunt Wisa,
I had a big day today. I got to go outside.
I’ve been trying to tell daddy that, now that I am a big cat and not a little kitten any more, that I want to go outside. Daddy has not let me go outside since I came to live with him. I stand at the screen door when daddy opens the other door to let the air in and meow, meow and meow, but Daddy does not seem to understand. He keeps on telling me that I am too little to go out.
Daddy takes Missy out every day. She is my big doggy sister. I don’t know why she can go out and I can’t. Well, I finally had enough of that – and I found a way to go outside.
This morning, when Daddy was getting ready to go to church (he does not take me there either!), I jumped up on the window behind daddy’s bed. I pushed real hard on the screen, and it came out. It was a big jump down – almost 5 feet, but I landed in the soft grass.
Well, then Daddy came out of the bathroom and saw the window. Aunt Wisa, I heard daddy say a bad word when he was by the window. He called all my brothers – they were sleeping in the living room. He ran upstairs and looked where I sleep when I want to get away from my brothers and sister. He can back down stairs and, I heard him say another bad word by the window.
I decided that I should go and hide from Daddy. I thought it would be a fun game – like when I place chase with my brothers. So, I went to the shed where daddy keeps the firewood. I like firewood, because daddy puts it into the stove and it keeps me warm when it is cold.
Well, daddy is pretty smart; he came out to the woodshed, too. I was climbing on the wood when I saw him and I ran right out the door. I ran outside and climbed up on the deck. Daddy came out of the woodshed and was shaking my treat box. Daddy did not look too happy, so I thought it best to keep away from him for a little while more. I ran all the way around to the front of the house and climbed to the little landing by the front door.
There is a little window by the front door that daddy keeps open all the time. Sometimes, I can hear bugs by the screen so I try to catch them – but daddy put a puppy proof screen there. Well, it’s puppy proof, but it is not kitty proof! Missy was at the window. She told me that Daddy would be really angry with me if I did not get in right now. I know to listen to Missy, because she always tells me the truth. So, here comes Daddy around the corner of the house, shaking the treat box. Missy tells me to get in right away – what is a cat to do? Well, I pushed and pushed really hard on the screen and I popped it all the way inside the house. I jumped in and ran under the bed!
Daddy came in and fixed the screen. He then came into see me in the bedroom. I though he was going to be mad at me, but he gave me one of my treats – the one with catnip in it. I like the catnip treat best of all!
Daddy walked away saying something about calling his card-ie-olo-gist and got ready for church. He also closed the window in his bedroom.
Well, that was my big day outside. It did not last long, but it was fun. I like to tease daddy!
Ranger
Kitten, first class

